FInally......!!

Thank you so much, AJKs! love u guys!
one of our group photo's

*all the other photo in facebook!=)

haha=) finally a post, huh?

i knw many of u have been urging me to post..but i really couldnt find time.

my blog is really dead i knw. but ya, i'm FINALLY back. dun worry, i didnt vanished into thin air n is still in "one piece" haha.=)

i jz wanna say " Praise The Lord" i went check up yesterday, it's all finally cleared.

doctor said my bone was fusing well

compared to the previous checkup this was the best...

previous checkup :

i) prominent screw (hope doesnt come out)

ii)no bending twisting running *really hard to survive these n i think i broke all kakaka

being the "active n sporty" elena.. ahh i miss running...

after tat operation...

throughout tis whole year... i act felt like i have a totally new back!

it's really hard n stiff (my back) n i cant lie back on most chairs..cant seat for long too.

well, tis year have been really tough!

i am totally two person

i) in church

ii) in school

so many things happen n it really changed me, i owe tis explanation to all of u, especially to all my church fren who cares so much for me.

in church until July (*i knw i have cheer up now*) :

emo, anti-social, easily irritated, not wanting to talk, want to b alone, not caring as i once was, eyes teary. n keep on crying n many others.

my dear sis n bro,

i knw tat u all who close to me have noticed tat big change of me who was once a cheerful, laughing, caring commited dedicated n sensitive elena... yes, i have changed a great deal.

and here i want to say SORRY really for all tat i have said done or felt which in any way have hurt u or smehow made u really tired of dealing w me..

i admit tat it was all my wrong

during tat period.

i really felt very tired EXHAUSTED, tired of alwaz caring for ppl n usually asked: y must i alwaz be the one caring for ppl, then who cares for me??? i'm felt even tired talking n interacting w ppl..i knw i made myself very hard to approach n talk to n i aplogize.

and now i shall explain y after i sorted out all tis w GOD.

i was really down tat tme.. n y tis change of behaviour?

tat's bcz I WAS VERY VERY FAR AWAY FRM GOD n it's due to my business planning for a camp in skul.

i didnt do my quiet time for very lng n felt as if i have lost the channel of love frm GOD which use to overflow to the ppl around me.

it was wen i realise tis problem i started to work on it..

i spoke to an older person n he asked me to find the source of where i went off

i prayed to God to revealed to me as i really did not knw wat is it

n the next day i did my quiet time after a very long time

n it said : YOU HAVE FORSAKEN YOUR FIRST LOVE n i dun knw y throughout the whole day tat was the verse tat keep ringing in my head!

tat was the first message i received frm God

but i fall back again n God show me sme things through circumstances

i fell down the DAY BEFORE my piano exam n to my surprise : i sprained my ankle *didnt knw it was tat serious wen i went back n my parents saw me, they keep telling me is smething spiritual as so many things happen in a short period as i was sick too tat tme, n the piano exam is very important. i knw tat they too notice the change in me n wen they said tat,

my tears literally fell n i kept on crying n couldnt stop..

it was smething planned by God to tell me smething!

he purposely made me fall down it's not coincidental, n jz the day before my exam,

lesson is : there was no one else i could depend on but HIM alone at tat tme i was so worried bout the exam as i needed to walk n step the pedal, n i was still limping then n it was painful too.

but i commited everything into His hands n told Him tat i will depend on HIM, n it was amazing!

the day of exam came

i went in n wen i was playing there was no pain at all, but once i came out of the room n started walking, i start to fell the pain.. it's a miracle!

God took away my pain for tat half an hour

oh, THANK GOD REALLY for tat.. n it finally taught me tat i have been struggling on my own for too long... n i must depend on HIM

**my whole world is really in a mess without HIM! i love you, LORD. n thank you

for being faithful wen i was faithless

n still draw me back wen i hurt your heart so much

You are great Lord, pls help me to stay close to u!

now in school,

yes i am a totally different person.

i am crazy, talk crab, laughing, cheerful n everything

it's jz a way to hide all my worries n not show it.

tis was not the usual me too, i was nt like tat last year n i wanna apologize too if i annoyed any of u w my attitude n being so noisy even wen teacher is teaching. i'm sorry, frens!

n i'm sorry teachers tat i went out of class almost every single period

n tat's bcz of all the load of kertas kerja i needed to handle which i had to learnt everything by myself! i'm really sorry, i didnt want to do tat but i had no choice.

camp was really a struggle

i basically HANDLED everything by myself ALONE frm the kertas kerja's to the plannings of the camp

phew! now wen i think back i wonder how i manage it!!! i myself am amazed at my ability

i really didnt knw jz a camp can make me work so hard put every single effort n sweat on it

i dun knw how many times i repeated doing the kertas kerja to achieved the standard tat Pn Chew required! wow! i really cant count. n it doesnt stop there still have to do kertas kerja for jabatan n was tendang balik oso, i didnt give up n did again! it was really tough! it was so much effort i put in, i even cried so much at one point i culdnt take the pressure wen exams were coming n they keep tendang balik the kertas kerja, the bookings pricing which i kept bargaining to n forth until i was scolded by the manager n i was alone..i really dun knw hw i handled it,

i tell u i really cant explain in words how overjoyed i felt wen i received the approval letter frm jabatan. i literally felt as if i was jumping into the skies.

i was....... REALLY HAPPY! i felt like running one whole big round around the skul but i control myself..*grins...

n all the plannings started.

games activities programmes things to bring to buy, n many others..

and here, i really want to take the opportunity to thank SHE MEI, MAGGIE, N CHIEW TENG N THE 4 FORM SIX GURLS. without u all i really dun knw how i survived it all!it was with ur support my dear frens! n everything u did is really appreciated n mean a lot to me! all the hard work we did was paid off during the camp.

going to a camp with only four AJK out of fourteen sounds quite impossible, huh??

but yes, we did it!!!

cheers to shemei mag n chiew teng

love u guys a lot!

n ya besides tat, i wnt to thank all the campers who came n cooperated with me!

although it was a small number but no doubt we enjoyed the camp ( hope u all really did)

sorry if i did or said anything wrong n offended any of u all.

but really Thank you at the bottom of my heart to evry single one of u!

u all made my camp succesful!

ahhh!! four wheel drive was FUN!=) hehe

yeah tat's all for this post sorry for the super duper loooonnngggg post!

jz a word of encuragement to those who feel dry in their spiritual walk w GOD
: God will never let u go no matter how far u went off, my dear sis n bro, try to find the source tat cause tat fall back. draw the strength frm God n dont struggling by urself. and TRY to do ur quiet time no matter how busy! it's really important to have tis relationship with God!