Am I Ready?

hmmmm...
i have been pushing many worries and thoughts away and keep saying to myself, let the results n God decide where my career would be.
recently, many people asked me WHAT IS MY PLAN AFTER THIS, and still i dont know how to answer.
it's scary to think that the year is ending and february, the starting of college is coming and still i have NOT come up with my final decision. the future have so many uncertainties, and everything can change just in a second. but if everything was easy, then there would not have been any challenge, i guess.
besides, questions that were popped to me was AM I READY FOR OVERSEAS? AM I IN FOR MEDICINE?

i would not have thought that i would be going overseas so fast. this is my country, everything is here.
AM i REALLY ready to leave provided i achieved all the requirements? there is so many things in malaysia, including friendships made and family that i'm quite sure would break my heart by just leaving malaysia. all the memories that i have to leave behind, stepping out of my comfort zone to a totally new place, new culture, and new people...i believe i am tough enough to be independent BUT leaving would be difficult.

AM I ABLE to cope with medicine studies when even SAM i felt it was hard enough. 10 years MAN! 10 YEARS!!!!! i would be like 30 dy by then, can i really withstand all the stress and pressure for a doctor's life..hmmm.. i am really scare if i do embark on medicine, i suddenly choose to give up half way, do i have enough PERSEVERANCE to endure it? sighs...

no matter what, the day would come one day for everyone where they have to take courage n take the first step out of their comfort zone. and so if it does come i will EMBRACE THE CHALLENGE WITH COURAGE!

well, i guess i have to be thankful for even having this phase in my life. all these decision making and stuffs, some people might want to be in this position to HAVE options but do not even have the chance for education. 

i just hope i will hold tight to the dream that is alwazys in my heart and that is TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THIS WORLD! i really want to go out there and help the needy and underpriveleged!

Dear Heavenly Father, i pray that wherever i go, that i will NOT give up FAITH in you and never stop believing and trusting. may i have a strong foundation and not be influenced by the outside world. protect my little heart Lord, and never let it go astray, i need You badly, Lord, to guard my heart from any temptations! and may the burning fire and passion that was once in my heart never extinguish.AMEN!
 
toodles~